Raggin' Piano Boogie

HIS SPIRIT LIVES ON! ... BONER, THE PIANO DOG ... November 27, 1994 ... February 20, 2010

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August 31, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I was certain Mo was dying last night. He woke me up standing next to me needing comfort, like serious comfort. He was on edge. I went to get him some water and he flinched. It seemed he was afraid. For the next hour and a half I held him close and stroked him as we looked into eyes. His was rolled into the back of his head as he tried to stay conscious. I sang to him our calming mantra while feeling peace for him. I wanted to make sure he was not in pain because I know he has physical issues. I gave him some pain medicine and then he went to sleep. So did I. Today, all is back to normal although I am shut down, numb. It could have been several issues psychological as well as physical. Mo carries life long trauma and physical issues. All is ok now.

August 30, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

The Sixth Community Traveling Piano made it to the streets today! Its time to stop and gather my thoughts on the matter and how I am going to continue with it all before I put out any more. I never know if its going to happen until it does. Everything is very in the moment, strangers communicating with each other, working to trust but not knowing if anyone is for real or not. Everyone feels relieve and very good when it is happening. They are glad the piano is being put to use, that they are getting rid of it, that someone wants it and that I am not a crazy person. It takes a lot of back on forth between those helping me move.

I need to consider those giving me the piano's, the places they are going always with the sun, wind, dirt, rain, legal issues, etc... whatever business it will be next to and considering my own time. This one is on Fremont Street in Downtown Las Vegas. Its the farthest piano from where I live, I need to drive to it. It is also in the worst condition. Where it is placed the sun is going to murder it, lol. My new friends Becky and Rick helped me once again, I need to be very careful not to ask them too many times. It will take me a while to get a plan together to check on them, makes signs, maintenance, I am getting a piano tuning kit. Just something else to deal with.

August 29, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

It has been pretty amazing with Mo and I getting through the summer. For Mo, I thought it would be a less than fifty percent chance he would survive. Me, I'm getting less exercise because I cannot walk in the heat and also my walking is very slow because of Mo's age. But, The temperatures have not been as brutal as last year. It has gone up to 120º several times and almost always over a 100º but nothing like last year. I think I may have actually been more busy than last year especially with the Community Traveling piano project. Considering my age, health and mind that I've been bringing up for the last few years and how much less I can do... this is all good to be able to say.

August 28, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I was throwing garbage out in my back ally where the pigeons look like rats. I thought about how pathetic and disgusting it is and I am sick of seeing them. There were two routes to take on the matter. I could hate them while thinking of the asinine laws made by pigeon haters to criminalize feeding them. Lets get real, a stupid law is not going to get rid of them. Then I saw a pathetic and disgusting emaciated homeless guy laying in a corner passed out where homeless people pee and shit. I thought... I'm caring about the pigeons more than my own people? How asinine are the laws to get rid people on the streets as though that is going to get rid of them?

The second route to take on the matter is to feed the pigeons so they get healthier and look more pleasing to me. Fifty pounds of chicken scratch for only seventeen dollars, a good solution. And a relationship has begun with them. It reminded me of a religious friend I have, a true Christian in a congregation of fascist trump supporters. Every Sunday she feeds them with amazing home baked deserts for the coffee hour after the church service. The magas can't help but partake in her true caring and love for Jesus through the food and they all know how she stands concerning her anti-fascist maga politics.

For myself through friends who contribute, it is not only pigeon feed but water with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the homeless in the ally and on the streets around where I live. My relating is an energy of love and care verses that of pathetic and disgusting. And so it is with myself, I need people to care for me so I can care for others and the pigeons, lol. Send some dough in the form of cash please.

August 27, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I've reached the limit for now with six piano's out on the streets. I am losing track of them in my mind. I'm beginning to think, what have I got myself into? There now must be ongoing commitment for upkeep and finding a tuner or learning who to tune and fix myself (good luck). On Saturday I'll be able to pick up the sixth one. People reach their limits fast when helping. They will give me there time once or twice buts thats it. I will need ongoing help. I ran around taking the tarps off them and packing all that up and then scoped out a few new spots while also trying to find a moving company to work with. There was one potentially really good spot up the street from me, a new small museum. I had to ring the doorbell to get ins.

Two dog came running to the door which forced two people to come out from behind a wall to fetch them. They were just going to pretend I wasn't there as I stood there wondering if they were going to ignore me. Then a woman with a resigned attitude came to the door and cracked it open, what do you want? I began to tell here and she shut me down saying she was in a four hour meeting. Lol, I was like see ya, wouldn't want to be ya... With her condescending attitude I wondered, how do people like that stay in business? Then I thought, they don't. Physical exhaustion set in and I felt a need to get back immediately to my place and just crash for the day.

August 26, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I am trying to deal with all the pianos by myself because finding people, waiting and wondering if they are going to follow through is just throughly draining in of itself. I need to build a lid for one of the piano's so I got some wood, nails, spray paint and a hammer to work with. Some of that I already have from the gallery. It was hot and humid and as I was sweating profusely, I hammered four simple small nails into a small piece of soft wood on the cement ground. I was like wow, this is so loud, too loud but I need to finish. I mean how loud could it be? Well, enough that it gave me some serious tinnitus like when a loud bang goes off and everything sounds like it is in a tunnel?

Then the high pitched ringing, buzz when I talked or played music. Ugh... the hissing is still here days later. I am sure it happened for the stress I was feeling in trying get done what was needed. There is no cure for tinnitus and I pray to God I do not have to live with it for the rest of my life. I've known other musicians who have had it until they died. Also, as night came on... I have had night blindness coming on for years. Now... just ugh. I'm always adjusting my abilities as they leave me now at 70 years of age. I still can do more than most people but compared to what I used to be able to accomplish... its one big... it is what it is.

August 25, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

The rain did not happen as was forecasted. There was downpours all around but not where I live, as usual. I do think it rained early in the morning while I was sleeping but maybe I am just telling myself that so all the work I did with covering and tying down the pianos did not go to waste. The temperature was in the low nineties and it being a cooler day I thought I might be able to take the truck out to create music on but... the air was so humid that it felt like a hundred and five. Neither Mo or I could take it. When I was out I began to feel dizzy and faint. How fucking cool is this? Lol, its not a city project, an art organization project just a single individual finding pianos and putting them out on the streets for people to use twenty four hours a day.

August 24, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

Of course now that I have pianos out on the streets, rain is forecast. It has not rained for about a half year. Did it take putting pianos on the streets to bring it on? I have bungie chords and plastic tarp from the art gallery I had at the beginning of the year and also gaffer tape. The plastic tarps turned out unusable because they were so thin and cheap so I found exactly what was needed at a hardware store. They were only six bucks a piece. A friend sent me the money to pay for them. Before it got dark ran around covering them all and put laminated signs on them saying they were covered because rain was forecasted as in... please leave the covers on.

Late at night I took Mo for a walk to check on them and found a homeless guy had lifted one of the tarps half off an was playing on the piano. I said no, don't do that... it was obviously wrapped up now it needs to be rewrapped. He had ripped some of the plastic. They are all reinforced with gaffer tape as when it rains it can be torrential with strong wind here in Las Vegas. It has not really happened this yea,r so we are due for it. Having a good tarp saves time, will be easy to put away and last for awhile. Sure do hope this all does not get out of hand with so much that I cannot deal with it. I'm trying to measure my physical and mental energy with it all. It is a commitment and I always give my commitments everything I have.

August 23, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

The guy who gave me his piano today, the exchange was very iffy and strange. I was fairly certain he was a scam of some type but I just flowed with it all and it worked out perfectly. He gets high allot and thats what I was dealing with, lol. It felt very ballsy for me to place this piano as it is in a very visible and in the center of the Arts District on the main street. Doing what I am doing now is 100% against how I was raised. Even at my age and with my accomplishments... fear is major in my life. Natural or ingrained empowerment does not exist. How dare I do something this significant? Who do I think I am? Do I think I can just go and mark my territory all over however I want to? Who am I to assume that other people will enjoy this? Why must I be such a showoff? Do I think I am a big shot? Why am I trying to be something more than I am?

How dare I interfere with the environment and interfere with what others may or may not want? How dare I insert myself in everyone's face without being invited? What is wrong with me, that I need so much attention? I am going to get into trouble doing this. I do not have the right permission. No one can just put pianos out on the streets everywhere. Who do I think I am? Of course all of that is bullshit. But that is the type of thinking I need to constantly move past. I am on private property with every piano and it is wanted very much and I have permission. My name is not on them, I am not with them showing them off and I am doing it to create music in the community that is fun yes, for myself but everyone else also. I'm not getting any money or special attention from it although that would be nice, but thats not my intention.

August 22, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

After a night with little sleep ruminating about pianos on the streets and what is needed, if people are going to follow through with help, are the people giving me the piano going to send the address and followthrough... I woke up and everything fell into place. A woman named Becky reached out to me from online offering to help move a couple pianos. Her partner Rick is a musician who also has a moving business that specializes in arcade machines, pool tables, etc... He has a pickup truck with a lift he built on the back.

Along with a dolly he had no problem at all. They did it with practically no effort. It is an old huge white piano with a very quiet voice. I'm realizing how each piano has its own personality. I put it behind a new restaurant right around the corner from me. The owners are very known in Las Vegas and they did not bat an eye with the idea. Jumped right onto it. The family who gave it to me were excited to know it was going and that the community was going to be able to enjoy it. I'll need to find a seat for it.

August 21, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I think I am going to leave the internet. It will be the end of life as I know it on many levels but it feels necessary in order to keep my individuality and truth in spirit intact. There are many people in the world who live without the internet. I may need to use it to pay bills and do a few things but continuing on with the social platforms, they are all going to shit and all of us with it. My character cannot justify contributing to the downfall of humanity. I can communicate via text, phone, in person or email. I can keep this website going as it is until it can no longer be seen on the internet.

Concerning news , there really is nothing more that I need to know. What is important always has a way of finding me. I do not need more awareness, do not need more understanding, certainly do not need more news about what is happening in the worst of ways. I have my music and art, my mind and soul, a few friends and for now Mo is still with me. There is also nature to enjoy and life to nurture. I want to stay conscious to who and what I am in spirit. AI will take all that for its own if I let it. Just like with platforms like Amazon. I knew it was a bad company from the start and to avoid getting sucked in and sold on needing it... I never started.

August 20, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

AI is just bad in every way. Living through what is happening to humanity right now is just almost unbelievable. But, I knew back twenty years this was all coming. I just did not think I would be around to live it. In 2016 when trump first got in, I knew the end times arrived. And then when he got back in this year well... I cannot act surprised about anything now. With it all I think AI will be the front runner concerning the loss of our freedom in mind, body and spirit. The seduction of AI and resulting submission to it will win but not with me if I can help it. When I see it online I almost want to cry because I cannot resist the creativity and everything else coming from it. So... I know I have been working to remove myself from it all because... it will not take long for me to get sucked into it all. It brings to mind those people in the World Trade Towers after the planes hit... do I jump into the fire or out the window.

August 19, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I just finished binge watching for two days the entire first season, fifteen hours of The Pitt a medical procedure television show because... I wanted to and needed an escape for a while. My phone got tuned off before going to sleep for the first time in many years, I just needed to escape. The news went bye, bye, I was on facebook in the morning to respond to a few comments and that was it for the day. I had posted on facebook a video of a girl being violently abducted my ICE and a fascist must have found it to share with his friends list and and twenty people posted laugh emojis on it. I blocked them all. They were a sampling of republican fascists, fake accounts, bots, jerk-off kinds, gaslit people, anarchists, etc...

What was most surprising, half were woman, woman with no compassion or empathy for other woman. Finding a objective balance with life is not easy. My joy right now is Mo and he really is a joy for sure! He loves me, respects, is happy with me, can't climb stairs anymore and can barely get up on his own but can still walk, is loving to eat, is loving the attention I give to him, loves to sniff around when we take a walk in the middle of the night when the temperature is bearable, and he loves people. I play a little music on one of the public pianos I put out when we walk and get lost in the music. Creating music on out of tune pianos that are clunky... I am really good at that now.

August 18, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I really do love people. There are those I have been hating on and I am not afraid to say that. Those kinds of people "aways" try to attack me with, "I thought you were all about fun, friendship and respect" which makes me laugh and respond with... thats not for you. But usually I say... I know you would like to think of me as one dimensional but I am not, go pound sand. My music and interactions are all about fun, friendship and respect except on very rare occasions when I end up interacting with a whack job. It happens maybe once every few thousand people. I do realize that what I have to offer most for the world is one-on-one musical relationships with people and I hope once the heat breaks I'll have the physical strength to do that. Certainly, the energy of mind and spirit is there. When I talk to people in general and get onto a passionate line of conversation non musical, most all of them cannot handle my energy. It gets stronger every year and kind of intimidates people as much as I try and stay aware and keep it toned down.

August 17, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

A group out to fight fascism had a meeting today so I went. It was a nice showing and mostly all old fogies like myself, maybe a hundred. They are a new organization and were out to make the experience of being there fun with a few prizes to be won and fun ways to connect with people. I wanted them to just get down to business. The first hour was two politicians pitching for their election campaign. With the one guy I thought, we are dead meat, republicans will tear this guy to pieces and throw him to the rats. The group received a large donation to help them get started and they talked about spending it on tea shirts and water bottles with their name on it, etc...

I though to myself, please do not do that. Grow through action not promotion. There was a protest they had yesterday and they we're kudos-ing the cops and how they are their friends and helping to protect them from the magas. I biting my tongue from jumping in to say that they are NOT our friends, they are doing a job, there were no maga to be protected from and they will turn on a dime at any moment to not be your friend if told to do so by their authoritarian, especially at a protest. One fascist cop will overpower ten non-fascist cops any day because... the so called "good" cops never take a stand against the bad ones. Never.

August 16, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

Get up, brush the dog hair from the bed and then have my coffee, check my emails and gloss over the news. Maybe eat, post some kind of contribution request online, do some activism for democracy, make a few peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to take out to the homeless the streets with cold water. Meditate for forty minutes, do this blog, work on the community Traveling Piano project. Clean up a little, file data maybe go up to the public pianos and clean them, create a little music. I am always trying to get into a routine, forever trying since my twenties.

I have a neighbor who said he would help me move a piano last week and blew me off. That cost me $50 for the truck rental and so I saw him. I told him that he cost me $50 and said in the future he should just be straight forward and upfront and just say no to helping someone if he is not going to follow through. He got bad at me for calling him out and pushed all the rocks and stones on my windowsill outside my room to the ground making a mess in retaliation. Ugh, I am so worn down from emotionally stunted, immature people. I have to just let that go as I do not want an escalation.

August 15, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I took Mo out to pee in the ally and it was next to a drug addict that pathetically is always lost cowering in a small cement cubical. I always say to myself, God please help him. And then I saw the pigeons that live in the alley. They look like rats. Is it any wonder? They live in and eat shit. I thought to go get some decent feed to give to them. If I don't like what they look like do something to help them look better. Makes sense. They certainly are not going to go away from not feeding them. And then I thought... you are going to help the pigeons and not the guy in the corner? The birds are the incentive I needed to help the guy. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with cold water for the guy and chicken scratch for the birds. I mean seriously, its little effort and time spent, I have the peanut butter and jelly... purchased some bread and chicken scratch is cheap.

August 14, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

My spirit without questioning is transitioning from this world. That is happening on a grand scale in every way for many others also. We are not in times of reality where millions of people have transitioned all at the same time for the first time, not by any means. The murder, disease of mind, body and environment has been happening since the beginning of time. For me right now... I want to take care mostly of my mind. Leaving this world in spirit with mindfulness is the way to go. Mind-fullness is being stolen. My perceptions of good and evil, truth, reality, spirit and everything there is in reality well, there is energy happening to gaslight it all. Why, is none of my business. My business is to take care of myself for myself for the sake of others and move away from the gas-lighting at all costs. I know my truth and I'm sticking with it through the grace of God as I understand through my innate knowledge in spirit.

August 13, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I am going to trust myself with what I have to say. In spirit, I do believe we are all one. Actually, I have been given an innate understanding of that, a gift. The perception of good and evil with humanity here on earth is part of our reality. One could say that perception is an illusion but then again one would need to accept reality as an illusion. It is, but never the less this is what we live in and with. Why? This is where many people turn to religion. Fact is we do not know why for sure at all, in anyway when all is said and done. The rationalizations and understandings that suit individuals for their minds as taught by others for the most part helps nothing. For myself, I've always had a sense of none reality. This is the reality of spirit where all constructs are just that and they mean nothing. Why? That is beyond my or anyone else's comprehension and that is just the way it is. Acceptance comes to mind.

August 12, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

Well, I've hide inside for periods of time when the temperature outside was below zero, when the heat and humidity was so unbearable that you could cut it with a knife and now with it 120º dry air with no wind (sometimes its worse with wind) and at seventy years old, there is no way I'm going to spend anytime outside. Mo even in needing to pee is like, I'll hold it for as long as possible. I carry him up and down the stairs not only because the steps are too hot for him but because his back legs have less strength to hold him up more and more everyday. It is very difficult seeing homeless people trying to deal with it all and now with fascist republicans forcing to institutionalize them, that is just horrifying for humanity on the whole. And then there are the pigeons around me. I've taken to throwing out food and putting water out for them. The energy they need to put out to even eat creates risk for them.

August 11, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

My very close friend Eric here is Las Vegas, he is 78 years old, I think. He retired 12 years ago where he had worked as a manager back east at a Marshall's department store for 30 years. He is now back there visiting his family for a month and amazingly still in touch with one of his old employees. Eric suggested they get together for a visit. That visit ended up as a picnic with over fifteen past employees he has not seen for 12 years. Think about the work environment he created where co-workers and manager are still interested in being friends together 12 years on. How great that store must have been for everyone who not only did business, but worked there. My close friends in life have always been individually accomplished with their work and gifted as significantly good people. They have not manifested financially rich ways or fame, their success has been with the more important aspects of life. Friends with money have never stuck for any length of time with me. Probably because they have been mostly about their money and not sharing it and life with others. Eric shares not only his brotherhood with me but also whatever money he has from time to time.

August 10, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

Well, we all knew clearly on some level what was to come when republican fascists in the USA took over the last election. Dealing with the ramifications of a dictatorship is exhausting. As someone who cares about strangers in need including immigrants who are poor, the homeless, those affected by gun violence, environmental tragedy, those suppressed by authoritarian religion and politics, people treated as less than which includes woman, the LGTBQ communities, military veterans who have been tossed aside when those in control are finished "using" them... to see people now disappearing, being kidnapped from the streets, the courts submissive to authoritarianism, the media being skewed in what it reports, the truth in spirit being erased, the rule of law almost completely gone, God help us. And now... trumps taking over of the military to use against us all... all three branches of our government are now being controlled by pure evil as intentional brutality, cruelty and revenge for dissenters.

And then there are the truly fucked up, stupid hateful people supporting it all. I am being infected with their hate and it is for them more than for what they are facilitating. Keeping a sense of fun and music with the Traveling Piano journey is becoming more and more difficult. All the above issues have been given special attention over the last twenty years through the Traveling Piano's journey through musical fun, friendship and respect. Now, it feels like more urgent attention is needed to address the fall of our society. It will not survive on just musical fun, friendship and respect or even awareness on what is happening. Working to serve the world with what I have to offer is losing its balance beam between fun and activism. Everything is becoming about witnessing the suffering of others and validating with reassurance the worth of humanity as a whole while trying to figure out how to whack off and out of this world, those who are evil.

August 09, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

I have been going through these phases of emotional, inspiration and physical energy where I throw myself into an activity and then my ability peters out without getting anywhere. When I was younger I would attribute it to just losing interest, procrastination or distraction. But now I know it is a real thing as a result of age. Maybe past issues exist but mostly it is age capability for sure. The only thing I can keep up a passion with seems the commenting online to attack, standup to whatever I see that is damaging to us all or to correct whatever. That just takes mindfulness which I can be very good with, there is nothing physical about it. Really though, it is anger, frustration and down right hate that is driving me. I could put all the feelings and emotions in a book or something else more productive but that does not seem to be happening.

A book is not necessarily more productive than acting out physically where and when needed. Although, when I've done all I have for the homeless, or in situations of environmental tragedy or with gun violence... all that was motivated by the same negativity of anger and hate from within. So now politically maybe I am just channeling what interests me for the sake of the world in a non-musical way. Although... I know that music is still the strongest way. To be more specific, musical interactions with other people. Unfortunately, the temperatures outside are now 115º and above everyday so, musical interactions with the Traveling Piano cannot be for now. The truck is covered with a reflective tarp but still the temperature the equipment is sitting in is about 140º. Last year I brought the equipment inside my room. I'm just not willing to clutter up the room now more than it is. If it is all being destroyed from heat, so be it.

August 08, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

A new friend Randy, a guy interested in public pianos from NYC, he works in cyber security and was in Las Vegas today for a convention. We connected to spend some time as he wanted to play on the pianos I have been putting around the city. We first met a month ago and while driving him around town playing on the truck, we found a random public piano that was beat to shit in an alley. I thought, how fantastic is this? That same day someone told me how they got a free piano from facebook. With my not being able to play in the heat and sun I thought, if there were pianos outside and all around, when I take Mo for his walk in the middle of the night when the temperatures are cooler, I can play on them. And so... the Community Traveling Piano project began.

August 07, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

While figuring out how to progress with the Community Traveling Pianos I've been putting out on the streets. The way it needs to work for me is to approach everything synchronistically and spontaneously. It all needs to fall in place in the moment. The idea of the place, the person who has stewardship of the space, getting the piano, all of it. This is in alignment with the journey. Nothing else has been working and that will not change. It is also the easiest way and the tradeoff for not needing anything from anyone. I make the offer, it happens or does not happen. Where they are placed needs consideration. Too much sun, protection from dirt, wind the gamble on rain, not too public, not too hidden, the quality piano for quality spots, etc...

August 06, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

There is a sign painter who does car wraps down the street from me. We have connected several times. I want to put a piano outside his workshop and he wants that. He has also offered to wrap the truck to make it look better without cost. The Traveling Piano truck looks like shit with the paint all faded and peeled off. We made plans twice now to go pick the piano up for outside his shop which takes arranging from my end to set up a time between the contributor, the destination, manpower and the transport vehicle. He's blown me off twice as have helpers. It is frustrating! I know their minds are all over the place with other activities or reasons but...

Damm it, if you say you are going to do something and you even pick the time and place, follow through. This, especially... when you offer without my solicitation. Or at the very least give a call to cancel. My life has been full of people who make promises and nothing more. And worse it really hurts when promises are offered and I have not asked for them. This is partly why I have ended up doing most everything by myself through life. And for sure at this stage of the game... it is not about me and who I choose to interact with. My being open to others with opportunity all around is like dating. After a number of losing propositions people just give up or shut down or become more manipulative in getting what they want. I believe in just keep going even with all the failures. So be it.

August 05, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

As I go around Las Vegas and ask business owners if they want a piano outside on their property I am solid on not investing in potential on wanting one place over another. If they hmm and haw with hesitation I just move on. I know they will say no in the end if I try to convince. It is a waste of energy for me especially as they are not doing me any favors. I am getting nothing out of it financially or otherwise and it is to their benefit. There are hundreds maybe thousands of places throughout the city where I can put a piano. I tell the store managers for the owners to call me if they are not in or do not want to come out of their office in the back. They all know who I am and what I do here downtown where I live. If they cannot put out enough interest, care or respect for whatever reason to return my call or get back to me after a visit, I just move on. If I was important to them, they would jump. Making people think I am important has never been in my game.

August 04, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

Everything is ending. Is it just for me and others that see life the way I do? Or, is it ending for everyone even those that do not see an end coming for whatever reason. In any case, I am constantly reminded through the internet about my life. Maybe I use it looking for a knowing in order to try and prepare or decide for myself how I want to leave this world. I believe that some people do not have control over their ending here. And then, others do choose personal control in many different ways. There are many paths in death that cannot be understood. Without question God and the Universe has total control of it all but I do believe we have a part in that control for ourselves. I have a mutual partnership of respect, self-empowerment, acceptance and joy and also the suffering of my choice with the God of my understanding and the universe.

August 03, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

My presence is disappearing on the internet as my ability to use it wanes. I refuse to join in the world of AI and I know not to embrace it from the start or I will have no choice. My computer is dying again and finding one to replace it is almost impossible. The applications I use no longer work on newer computers. With my mental challenges there is a zero chance I am going to learn or want to learn to transfer everything my entire archives and filing systems to a new way and learn that new way. I am holding on by a thread the way it is. I cannot access the web to do any financial transactions, most of the news sites no longer support my browser and all the social platforms are dropping off one by one. The internet and AI is trying to force me to use my phone to access and do everything or by a computer that is not under my total control. Thats not going to happen. I need a desktop to work as I do and a phone is too small and it also is limiting for my work. So, the time is soon coming when I will be done with all this.

August 02, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

The heat last night was very dangerous for me to be out in even though it was dark. I can feel now when I am in trouble physically. I become weak, dizzy and faint when any physical effort is needed. All ability to move slows down to an almost stop. If palpitations being, I stop everything and breath easy from my groin in a relaxing way, out of the heat. Bouts of this began a few years ago with covid. It only happens now when I am exerting myself in heat. Although when I get up from lying down for awhile I am always dizzy. For the entire day I was knocked out with no energy. When taking Mo for a walk I sort of go into a daze. I had a meal that I've had many times and it went right through me. I know it was from the state I put myself in last night. I'm up to the challenge of adjustment! I only go out in the heat when Mo needs his walk and he can do it, and it is under 90º. No using the Traveling Piano in temps above 90º.

August 01, 2025

Las Vegas, Nevada

The heat with my age is a constant adjustment. With it dark outside but still in the nineties, I had to walk about five blocks with Mo to get to a community Traveling Piano and check on it. Tonight was a First Friday event here downtown where I live and the streets were packed with people and vendors and everything that entails a festival. The piano I was checking on has been placed where the center of the event is held. Since this is a new blog month I want to explain what is going on as it is new... seeing as I cannot use the Traveling Piano in this heat which is about 110º everyday where I am, I've been finding free pianos on facebook that people just want to get rid of and putting them around town for the community. It is a challenge finding people to help move them and transport them and arranged it all but I have three so far.

As I figure out how it is all going to work, tonight I was concerned about drunk kids all over it, buskers (one alcoholic I know in particular) trying to use it to make money from. The piano is for the community it is not a performance venue and also I do not want to get on the cities radar concerning zoning laws and permits. I was concerned about protecting it in the middle of a mass crowd. Luckily, where is is situated it is out of the way of the main festival area less than 20 feet away. The piano is painted black so it does not stand out in the dark. Vendors lining the area in front of it created a wall where it was not even noticeable. I put a little sign on it saying closed for repair and a sign about respect concerning what it is, why it is there and that it is personal property for everyone to enjoy but basically, don't fuck it up, lol! Mo did ok with the heat as he was completely focused on the chaos and noise going on all around him.