Raggin' Piano Boogie
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Since 1987 |
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April 30, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaMy time has been spent filling up new storage space I have. And then I must file everything to know specifically where it is. Shelves had to be purchased. Right side level A, level B, etc... the are is filled with gallery signage, the photos, art supplies to put everything together, gallery hardware which I no longer need at the moment, a fan, tables so much stuff. That along with camping gear which I hope to use, some Christmas and Halloween decorations, appliances... I purposely did not want a large space because I will just collect more stuff to fill it up. When I sold my home and gave away my belongings... I had three houses worth of belongings stored in one. Never again! 
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April 29, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
Some random thoughts I've written down over time....Being normal is not necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage. You don't stop playing because your get old you get old because you stop playing. I'd like to start thinking of everything as music, in terms of music and see if it will lead to more understanding. I just realized that finding, choosing and manifesting happiness... it all happens at the same time. Its the space, the existence of what we call a miracle. I found my passion for life through this journey and I followed it. I came to a point of being honest about it and what it is and then nothing else mattered. I... just "do" it. |
April 28, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
Just some more random thought from the past to fill up this blog space because I am doing the same thing every day. For better or worse we live in a society. It is not possible to care about, or change, or help society if I do not participate on some level in societies actual ways of functioning. Life is full of negotiation. I do not like many of societies laws but I must be response-able in order to be part of... so I choose whats right for me carefully. Society provides many things that I use... say the roadways. I would be nothing but a "user" if I sat and simply thought "I want good roads" while everyone else did the actual work to have them. It is like people saying they hoped, prayed, told friends, sent good energy from the universe for me to get a new truck engine. I said I needed three bucks. In reality both must exist. The universe was how... the money is reality. Friends who help with the reality part are co-creators with me and the universe. For this I am sure.
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April 27, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaThe fact with the gallery have closed and the intimidation and theft I dealt with... I do not have a problem so much with what was taken, the loss I feel is from all the work put into getting it, organizing it and preparing my palette (so to speak) for the work. A couple that I have helped throughout many years now, doesn't matter who it is... tweekers not in recovery will always screw you in time no matter what. Lol, this must be about the fourth time I am writing about them. How they think and act comes from a lack of self-respect and habit of self sabotage. It comes from a lack of gratitude and truth in spirit. I take full response ability in that I fooled myself in thinking that because I have done so much for them, gratitude would exist. 
 I take full responsibility in thinking that because there has been respect between us after seven years, along with the idea of potential relational growth for future friendship, ugh... self denial ain't just a river in Egypt. A tweeker will "always" screw up a relationship. They may look and act functional even for long periods of time but eventually... Well, yea I feel hurt, angry, frustrated, livid, and most of all powerless... I just need to give all that up to a power greater than myself, my concept of God and ask that my thoughts be directed, period. The saying, Sometimes You Eat the Bear, and Sometimes the Bear Eats You comes to mind. This is the only way to acceptance in order to let go. |
April 26, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaLast night I had little sleep not just because I am feeling crazy but because I knew I had a commitment to get up and did not fall asleep in time to feel rested. I scheduled a pickup for food at the vegetarian food bank and would need to stay for the entire time they were distributing food to create music for everyone because... thats what I do. I wrestled in my brain with myself all night whether to follow through or just cancel. It did not matter if anyone else cared, it was a matter of my following through with something I said I would do. I do not need any food in fact, I have no room for any food. The alarm went off and I said fuck it, I am not going. 
 A half hour latter I jumped up, shaved, brush my teeth, threw Mo into the truck and off we went. We came home with seven large boxes of huge potatoes, onions, carrots, zucchini, cucumbers, almond milk, rice and beans while I thought... why did I do that? Now I will need to cook it all and then take it out to serve for people on the streets. Like I have time (or energy) to do this??? I've told myself over and over that I am done. Each time I say, the last time. Its been eight years now. I asked all the people working if they wanted a group Traveling Piano photo. They were like, naa... and that suited me fine. |
April 25, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
Last month while driving my front windshield started to flap. The metal striping holding the glass blew off. It happened once before several years ago. This was just another piece of stripping, a bigger piece! So, it is being held on with gorilla glue and duct tape. A new windshield would cost about $400 and finding the striping needed from a junk yard will be almost impossible because the truck is so old. And then today... I find a huge crack in the windshield glass from top to bottom. What was once a performance show piece, the Traveling Piano truck is now old and dying. It may be past the point of return without any possibility or rebuilding. Just like myself and Mo... life is doing what it does on us all.
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April 24, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
With my living space of only 400 square feet, not much can fit into that. So, the gallery supplies and a lot of what I need to use on and off has been stored in my friends Eric and Mary's garage. That has been for several years now. Mary's sister lives with Mary and Eric. She is an absolutely wretched bitch who dominates Mary. Mary dominates Eric, lol. Mary wants the space back because the sister has been bitching on her about it. The sister does not like Eric and hates that Mary and I love each other so, she does everything she can when any opportunity presents itself to try and sabotage our relationship. She knows in making me move my stuff out, that will hurt both Mary and Eric and, it does. The solution... Mary and Eric are paying for a storage unit for me to rent. It is a small 5'x8' space that will be totally packed but, it is also only a few blocks from where I live. Mary and Eric's garage has been a half hour away. I will be better able to access to my possessions. Also, when they go away, I can't go to the house with the witch living there so this solves that issue also. But, I just hate that the witch uses me to hurt them and gets away with it everytime.
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April 23, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaA guy contacted me to play on the Traveling Piano while visiting here in Las Vegas. He lives in New York City. Because of the rise in public pianos over the years, people think that I operate the way the other projects do. What I do is not a "project." I am not a non-profit. I am not out to be an online piano influencer or like others who try and copy me for self-centered promotion. Sometimes people think that the Traveling Piano is a vehicle for them to perform on and that I exist for them, something they can take advantage of for free and at their conveyance because I will benefit in some way. Well, that is not what I do, have ever done, how I work or what I am about. This blog over the years states and shows exactly what I am about. 
 Yes, I may drive someone down the strip playing the piano but not before I meet them and get a feel for the situation. And, I am flexible for people but not available 24/7. The Traveling Piano is not a performance vehicle for people to create entertainment on. It has always operated as something discovered, a surprise to come across. It is a synchronistic and spontaneous experience. I talked with the guy briefly by phone and could feel him wanting for me to be impressed by him, lol. Our get together never happened. He blew me off and again... drives me crazy when I make plans with people and they do not follow through or even tell me that they are not going to follow through. That will never be acceptable behavior for me. My time is valuable and I do not state that in a boasting way. |
April 22, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
As time moves forward and away from the gallery closing, I realize how traumatized I have been in what made me jump ship from it all. The owner, such a nice guy but an enabler 100%. He had two drug addicts living on property who built stuff like an outdoor stage and cleaned up for him. They were worth more than I so the owner allowed them to basically rape me in his home while knowing it. Three times I said, please tell them not to go into my area. Each time he had the same reply. "I told them not to" while he repeatedly allowed it. All the contribution I had garnered over the last few months, several thousand was lost in building the place and the repeated theft. When my speaker was stolen I remember going to the meth addict and asking if I could borrow the spare speaker I had and gave him in appreciation for the little work he had done and he said no. He had another (a crappy one) that I could use. That floored me and I knew it was the start of trouble. How stupid I was to trust drug addicts even when I've known them for years.
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April 21, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaMy friend Trudy who has a homeless outreach non-profit... I joined her where she was distributing resources today at an apartment complex in Las Vegas with the Traveling Piano. There was a couple I know who was helping her out. I knew them from when they were homeless on the streets. They now have had a place to live and have been set for a few years. This is a rare happening for me and I feel so much love for people I run into who have made it through hell to a better place in life. I had an interaction with another guy, he commented on how much he needed our meeting today. I could feel his love for me. A woman got onto the piano with her live five foot long pet snake. She played on the piano with the snake around her neck. I could not get a photo good enough to show it. My ability to move fast enough to capture unique situations is not what it used to be. 
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April 20, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaHere we are and it is Easter. This is the first holiday I can remember not taking the Traveling Piano out and doing something special with it specifically for the homeless on the streets. The energy, strength and stamina to do anything did not exist today. I want to share what gives me comfort today. My mother who was Ukrainian turned me onto the fine art of painted Ukrainian Easter Eggs. I've always loved them and found the opportunity to get a few for myself from the Ukraine. This is very special for me to have been able to support someone living there in the Russian genocide of the country but also to have and enjoy them for myself and the loving memories of my mother's love for Ukraine. Her family escaped the Holodomor, the last genocide that Russia created when they starved millions of Ukrainians under Stalin's reign. Along with my crystals, rocks, my vintage Christmas candelabra and a porcelain hummingbird my friend Gertrude who has passed, she gave to me many years ago... I feel comfort today. 
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April 19, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
I will, in fact get this blog up to date. A lot has happened since March 17th, the last blog entry and... this has never happened before for such a length of time, not blogging. Eventually it will get updated. Accepting what is and adjusting to how much I am able to do these days well, I just do the best I can. I attended a political protest today here in Las Vegas, part of a national protest to stand up against the dictatorship America is sinking into completely. It tuns my stomach. It drains my ability to live this journey. There is no way I am going to ignore it. I've contacted as many family members as possible to tell them to speak out. Not one, will. In fact they are distancing themselves form me more because they just do not want to disturb their social circles. They are stupid fools. When the time comes that they want to speak out, it will be too late. |
April 18, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaThe Traveling Piano Gallery is finished. There are several reasons. The heat over the past week broke the straw so to speak. I just can't work with the piano in the sun and Mo certainly cannot handle it anymore. Eighty degrees feels like ninety and the sun is just too strong. Keeping up the gallery by myself... it is just too much. The city would not allow me to setup there unless I paid and/or they controlled what I do and when. Fuck that. There are drug addicts that hang out at the spot everyday and their energy wears on me. They keep people who are not drug addicts away because of course they are not safe to be around. There are two specific homeless drug addicts living on the property who I have known for years. They were originally helping to build the gallery and people who I have given to over the years big time. 
 They have fucked up our relationship royally. Surprise? Drug addicts will always sabotage a good relationship. The situation has turned dangerous for me. I can either retaliate or detach. They have stolen from me and have been bad mouthing me to what I call an angry dyke bartender and her lover who also work on the property. Being gay myself, I have no issue in using that terminology. It is what it is, the specific character is a breed I know well. They all joined in the dysfunction of trying to damage my reputation with immaturity and were becoming meaner each day. As a seventy year old man with lots of experience, I know there can be no win in the situation for me and... I am just too old to deal with the shit. It is why I choose my present life. To get away from all that. |
April 17, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
I know my end is near. My goal is to be able to control how I leave this world in my mind. Physically, I realize I have no control over that, how, when, where, etc... But, I do have control of my mind in spirit. I want to enjoy the process of leaving, enjoy every moment on earth, make the most of it. Also I have been thinking about the hate others attempt to instill into my spirit. Some of it I embrace for whatever reason in my mind and it is real. I may act on it in negative and hateful ways but that does not negate the fact that is is not what matters in any way or form in the sense of spiritual energy, that which is all that really exists in reality. That spiritual energy for me is all love.
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April 16, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaI'm working to see how we are going to continue with the heat coming on. I know I need to use sunscreen on my head. The problem is the worsening ultraviolet rays from the sun more than the heat. Mo, cannot take the heat from the sun on the rug once it gets over eighty degrees so he hangs out on the ground more and more. The umbrella helps a little but never fully covers myself, Mo and the piano no matter the angle. I purchased a portable swamp cooler for the gallery because inside under the tent is like twenty degrees hotter than outside. That is no good for the photos. Lots of water, a fan to keep the air moving, figuring it all out but... once it begins to hit a hundred forget it it, we will be done. 
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April 15, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
I found an old writing that I never blogged. It was before 2012. The journey as I know it will be ending soon. Exactly when, why and what it will mean or look like to me I have no idea. It could be end today and then again it might me six years from now. "Soon" is a relative term. My mother thought the world was going to end "Soon." It did for her... just not in the way she thought which was from a religious armageddon along with media chaos and predictions. She thought about it, felt the fact her whole life and that life ended thirty years ago. I lived with my dad and felt an impending doom as he began to drink alcoholically and show physical signs of deterioration in his later years. As he used to do things like fall down or just sit in darkness and watch television I would think and feel, "he is going to die any day now." It was all a very real for me as I analyzed and calculated from life experience through fear. I was sure of what I thought I knew everyday... for fifteen years.
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April 14, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
I found an old writing that I never blogged. It was before 2012. So anyway... before the journey ends and at whatever cost or consequences (like ending up living on skid row)... I am going to Las Vegas. I just want to see it. It has been on my bucket list and is one of the original animations made for this website when I first began. Even if I just drive through it and get a picture that will be good enough. After that, Los Angeles. I've been there but never with the piano and truck. The idea, "New York to LA" with the Traveling Piano has always had a nice ring to it... even more than New York to Seattle or Newfoundland, Mexico, Canada or Alaska which we have done. I was heading to Hollywood five years ago with a plan to open up my wildest dream to the world on a television show and also to have the world meet Piano Dog Boner before he passed. I was where I am now in Arizona when the student government from Virginia Tech called me after their massacre asking us to come and spend time with them so... it turned out not to be the time for Hollywood. The second attempt was when Boner became sick. I thought, "we need to get there before it is too late) We got as far as Missouri before he passed. The world did end up meeting him just not in LA. So now... third try.
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April 13, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaI found an old writing that I never blogged. It was before 2012. I was thinking about being in LA for the first time and the fear of myself in being there. The only specific agenda will be to share the Traveling Piano but I am apprehensive because I don't want to lose myself and that is easy to do, meaning... become someone I am not. (bigger than life in my own head and to other people) It will take constant and diligent effort (which I hope will not exhaust my energy) to not see every person and interaction not as an opportunity or possibility to fulfill illusional needs. I want to experience everyone as an equal and be responsible with my interactions of fun, friendship and respect. When I meet influential people my job will be to enjoy their spirit and accomplishments. 
 The nature of the stereotypical hollywood animal, oh it can feel so good... is enjoyable and I do want some but... must know when enough is enough and when to get out and... be always objective about what is happening if anything does. God, I hope I have learned enough to "keep it all real" trust myself, stay conscious and not become delusional about what I want more and more and more of. Then again I may not even partake in any hoopla. Here in Tucson I haven't even been to the center city upscale hoopla and I know in Vegas there is a possibility I may never see the inside of a casino although for about thirty years I've been wanting to see Circus de Soleil. But then again, "Hey Danny don't project concern... your still here in Tucson will be another week and then it will probably be a few more weeks before you even get to California. |
April 12, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaMo and I got out into the desert today. It has been a long time since we have been out in nature because of the gallery and just physical limitations. Mo can no longer walk in a rocky area or get a grip with his feet on smooth stone. We stuck to short distances of walking and I watched him very carefully concerning his losing balance and letting his back legs slip out of joint. Actually, the joint is gone from arthritis, thats the problem. Never the less, we had a wonderful time. The day was perfect and we both were in our heaven together. I so much love this earth and am so grateful to be here to enjoy its nature. 
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April 11, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
I was thinking about the many different people who have invited me into their homes. With all the experiences, over a hundred fifty I think... I would still feel a little uncomfortable with a stranger staying with me... if I had a home. A lot of effort would be needed to adjust myself to caring about them enough to feel as welcomed as I would want for myself with other people. Well, thats just the truth. Old ways, indoctrinated thoughts and habit I am fairly certain I'll be working on to empty from my psyche for the rest of my life. As far as sleeping arrangements in people's homes, everyone cares on a different levels. I'll never forget the first time someone gave me their bed and took the sofa for themselves. This has happened several times. Continued... |
April 10, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaContinuing from above: People have also shared their cellars, sofas, floors, air mattresses, futons, garages, outside tents and yurts, some spaces are set up nicer than most bedrooms. Everyone has always tried to make the spaces as comfortable as possible. Most situations are not as nice as what they have. (like their own bed) I was thinking about this today because as I was driving down a road past very wealthy estates and farms I saw tents set up in fields here and there. I know from experience they are woofer tents, people who work on the land in exchange for the ability to pitch a tent and stay on a property. Some choose this lifestyle others I am sure would rather have the best bed on the land. That got me to thinking about the humongous estate houses with many rooms rarely used and the levels of trust, the sharing of space since the beginning of time. 
 The hierarchies of property owners, entitlement, workers quarters, kings and serfs, etc... who deserves to live where and how... sleeping conditions, class systems and so on. I have come to the conclusion that money is not the route of all evil. The idea of deserving and entitlement, lack of trust concerning the material world is the route of all evil. The idea of who should have more or less is the route of all evil. I totally understand that for some people it is not an issue of wanting visitors not to have equal or better then themselves... they just do not want to forgo what they are used to, their routines with sleeping and waking, familiarity, do not want their "stuff" messed up, etc... Still, I believe there is a subconscious side to many people's thinking that is all about entitlement. Of course this is what has been taught or learned through example. Continued... |
April 9, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
Continuing from above: Most people share but do not share equally. The issue of deserving in that someone deserves more than another person, thats where all the trouble starts for humans. When I was down in Katrina and I met a woman that lost her piano in the storm I wanted to buy one for her. The first place I checked out was a pawn shop and there was a crappy keyboard for $400. I almost purchased it but thought, "I can't give a piano player an instrument that I would not want for myself because its not good enough." The feeling that I had after giving the best I could which was a pretty damm decent piano is something you can only know by doing. Many people know the good feeling in giving. But "over the top" the most possible" "more than for myself" (within sensibility), it is an ultimate experience. |
April 8, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
A guy from Germany attending a convention here in Las Vegas found the Traveling Piano today. We spent a good amount of time together and I mentioned while we were talking that I would take him into the Valley of Fire while he is here to see some of the nature surrounding the city that is unique. Nothing like it can be found anywhere else in the world. When leaving I hesitantly asked if he wanted contribute through a photo and he was like absolutely not, too expensive. Lol, I thought to myself now I need to take him to the desert anyway because I said I would. After we came back from the desert, he felt compelled to make a grand gesture with a $100 contribution. It was a huge offering for him and he said he would rather give it to me than gamble with it as planned in his budget. it meant a lot to me and the feeling from it after having spent time felt brotherly.
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April 07, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaThe flower shop manager on the street behind where the gallery is took in photos to sell at her store to help support the Traveling Piano. This is the first business outlet to do this. They are photos of flowers placed around plants for sale. If they sell any I will be surprised, especially since their street is closed for construction and they have no walking traffic. But its the idea of it that is totally fun for me, the gesture of support and... we can create video's for social media promoting it. 
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April 6, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
How is Mo doing? Every night when I am about to give him his food he becomes full of joy! He used to jump up and down from all four legs now he must be careful with just two but still does what he can. His failing physical abilities as a result of age have not diminished his love for life, companionship, exploration and appreciation, not even one percent! He's living with the limitations of age. Not being able to go outside in the heat and at night walking in 95ยบ makes things more difficult when it comes to "use it or lose it" concerning the ability to walk. There is no space to walk around inside so he spends the day on the bed. I am carrying him up and down the stairs more and more and he has issues squatting to poop! But... he is loving being alive, eating, loving still being able to move around, loving me and the security I am able to give him, he is happy, still interacting with people, playful... |
April 05, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaA mother contacted me from back east saying her son who plays the piano, she is bringing him to Las Vegas for a graduation present and was wondering if I would allow him to play on the Traveling Piano. Well, of course! But I told her to have him contact me because he is grown up now and I wanted for him to create the relationship with me. He did but was full of questions like how long could he play on it, would I drive him down the street, he could not give me a time, etc... I told him I would be as flexible as possible but had to also deal with the Fundraising Gallery. I wanted to meet first to see what we could do together. I am not just going to tell a stranger that I will drive them down the street playing the piano before I meet them. 
 There are many factors to consider along with the spontaneity and synchronicity to experience. The stamina of a piano player feeds into the situation. I need to get a feel if someone is able to do it. Playing the piano while driving on a street with traffic is not as easy as it may seem. We had today set and somehow it got all messed up. I could sense a lot of control issues going on which was creating chaos for their visit to Las Vegas. It didn't happen which was kind of a pain in the ass for me. I invested interest and put it into my plans. It is not like I have nothing to do or think about in life and when I say I will do something, following through, which I always do takes a lot of effort. |
April 04, 2025Las Vegas, NevadaIt got very tense on the street today. First a huge, muscled shirtless black guy somewhat mental was connecting with my music so I got him up onto the piano seat for some significant musical relating which I know he appreciated greatly especially because I was not fearful of him. Then another really mild guy living on the streets got onto the piano seat. He was nervous but found the courage to extend himself to relate. From across the street a few aggressive Los Angeles types approached one with a camera and he was totally intrusive with it. I allowed that until the kid said he was beginning to feel uncomfortable and began shaking. 
 The guys camera was at one point inches from the guys face. I walked around the truck and said to the guy that he had enough footage he was making the kid nervous, please stop and leave now. He said "why"? He was not going to comply and I had to get in his face yelling enough that he had to keep wiping my spit off and even then he just would not leave. The muscled guy was there and became ready to pounce on my behalf so I had to show that I was in control. It was nasty, uncomfortable, has never happened before and I am sure freaked out many people in the area to see the piano man raging on the street. |
April 03, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
There is no way I can be up and out and working with the truck and art gallery five days a week. I thought I might be able to do it but just, no. Once I reach a point of exhaustion it takes days to recover. Even as I work to find ways to sustain my energy level and make it last still... just the act of committing myself to the day... is a days energy. So, I have gone down to four and now three days a week. I've tried days without the piano just opening the gallery to save energy. That is no fun at all. People are not interested in the gallery without the truck there and I can't really explain anything without showing them. It feels like they are missing out. Adjusting to age sucks especially when I used to have so much energy and be able to accomplish so much each day and everyday with my work. As crazy as it is, I probably said this before, there was a time where I could go through forty people on the piano seat in a day. Now, twelve would put me out with a few days needed for recovery.
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April 02, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
Random thinking... Sometimes I come across as I don't know what to do but that is just an "old me" projecting neediness for attention with the hope of escaping any "doing." I am hoping someone will live my life for me. There are times I actually believe that I do not know what I am going to do while at the same time I am always planning on what I am going to do. Here's some enlightenment that I like to think about for myself. The sorrow we experience in the world can be regarded as the exercise or emptying ourselves of what went before, so as to make room for the joy that is rightfully ours in the future. We humans have a moral obligation to seek joy in order to align ourselves with God the universe or whatever. |
April 01, 2025Las Vegas, Nevada
Someone I know from the past called to make sure I am ok as I've not made a blog post since March 17th. Here I am thinking no one reads this blog! I should no better. Many people, many more than I could imagine read this blog or come to check in from time to time. I've got parts of the past month done to post, photos from all those days not yet processed, I've been slowing up and there is just so little time. My priorities have shifted to getting the art gallery set up and working with the Traveling Piano in connecting with people there. The gallery will probably be done just in time for the hundred degree weather when I won't be able to use it. Wouldn't that be how it goes? I've been working in a brain fog more than ever before. |